Pop psychology makes you believe you have a problem when you care deeply. 

There is so much content about the need to have rock-solid boundaries to protect yourself from the energy vampires out there and all the people who want to take advantage of you for caring about others.

The amount of posts on social media that address women and blame them for being mistreated by men is astounding.

Where is the content for the people who are using others, being selfish, and benefitting from other people’s big hearts to stop being such assholes?

This is reflected in larger social structures that have devalued the emotional and creative work that keeps our world connected and evolving.

The people with less prescribed power in our society are more likely to do the work to ensure we are all cared for collectively.

Women, BIPOC, queer, and disabled people do disproportionate work in our society to ensure that people are cared for. Their work is less valued both in social status and monetary compensation.

When you work on the ground, trying to ensure people are fed, housed, and emotionally cared for, you don’t have the resources you need to care for everyone who needs it. 

Then you are expected to work for little pay, extra hours, and overfunction in a broken system, all while feeling like no matter what you do, it is never enough.

When you care deeply, you tend to do more emotional work because you see that others are suffering and want to do what you can to make this world a more tolerable place for everyone.